Thursday, December 24, 2009

Dichotomy: Love and Loyalty

I love, not people, but their attributes, actions and thoughts.

These attributes, actions and thoughts might inspire loyalty.

People can change. So can the attributes, actions and thoughts I love. Love is labile.

Loyalty is greatly dictated by force of habit. It resists change, and ends up seeming like it is towards people.

This dichotomy injects restlessness and discomfort into life.

The solution, though not perfect, lies in the fact that: to love is not an obligation; loyalty is an obligation, but only as long as I assure of my loyalty.

Obligation ceases when the assurance is withdrawn.

But this is all theory; practice is quite different. ;) Because this withdrawal requires audacity that I might not always possess.

So, each time I suffer on account of this dichotomy, the real reason is my cowardice.

Ah! This fact is comforting and easier to live with. :)


Niti said...

dudee!!! this is too complex and muddled up a read for my jet lag induced brain...will have to come back

Note to self: no reading this blog when I am brain fucked!! :P

Ketan said...

Niti, so the positive conclusion I could draw is you would read this blog whenever you are erm... brain-foreplayed? ;)


Niti said...

either that...or when I am in the mood to be mentally seduced. :D

I never thought such a mix of brain and seduction was ever possible..but here we go.. :D

Ketan said...


Psst... It's best we stop this here before we reach a point of no return. Or else we might end up producing brain-babies! Brain-washing was (and still is) one of the purposes behind this blog, but not brain-procreation!!! ;) TC.

Niti said...

Not true.. I sometimes like people even if they haven't done or thought anything good.Sometime I just like them for what they are.
Infact I am loyal to people only because of what they do or think. I cannot be loyal to people just because I am habitually a loyal person.
Loyalty does not resist change - it is the change - in effect that I would go to any extent to remain loyal to a particular person - which could very well be unlike me.

Though I agree with the rest of your post, in the relative nature of things, the premise is a faulty one.

About brain procreation - its not such a bad thing..n neway it's a point of no return. :)

Ketan said...


I have almost expressedly stated in my blog's description that the posts on this blog are conclusions drawn from my life, so obviously 'data' drawn is also largely from my mind only. :)

And as far as my current understanding of the working of MY mind goes, it is reflected in the post.

Quite possibly, you and I are different when it comes to how/who we love and how/who we choose to become/stay loyal to.

From your following statement, it seems you got one aspect of 'habit' wrong:

"I cannot be loyal to people just because I am habitually a loyal person."

By habit, I did not mean being habitually loyal to EVERYONE. I meant being (rather, CONTINUING to be) loyal to those who I had been loyal to in the past. Discontinuing to love happens very 'jerkily', i.e., spontaneously and subconsciously (at least in my case), but deciding to discontinue being loyal is attached with a feeling of guilt, which adds to the inertia. This inertia is what I have termed habit.

@ "About brain procreation - its not such a bad thing..n neway it's a point of no return. :)": *brain-blush* ;)


Srishti said...

Okay, this one is reallyyy good.

Loyalty is an obligation and to love is not; but loyalty towards a person you love is the strongest whereas loyalty JUST as an obligation stands on weak foundations.


Ketan said...

Yes Srishti, very rightly understood. And that weak foundation for loyalty is merely having been loyal TO THEM in the past.

So what worsens the situation is to fall out of love is seen as permissible (by the society as well as the self), but not to fall out of loyalty. :)